There Will Be Good day And Bad Days In Parenting..

There are good days and bad days in parenting and I believe the good most certainly out weigh the bad. There will be times we make make wrong decisions/choices and there are times we make right choices. It is up to us to try not to keep repeating the wrong ones and better yet if it were possible not to make any wrong ones at all, however I am not that parent who has never made a wrong decision/choice. I try not to raise my voice although I have but not recently, I try not to say something that hurts my children, although I have even though I didn't realize at the time it hurt them. We will never be perfect parents, however we can strive to be good parents. When I was younger  my mom tried to tell me something for my good I thought I knew what was best and trust me now I wished I had listened to her more, because I then could have a avoided a lot of the heartache i went through as an adult... We try to tell our children things to keep them from repeating our own bad choices, however we cannot force them to listen, all we can do is to continue to pray for them (if you are a believer of prayer) and to continue to love them unconditionally, that is not to say we must condone and approve of all of their choices... So sometimes as much as we want to protect our children from our repeating out past bad choices and their own current ones we must in fact step back for a time and allow them to choose and learn from their choices, no that's not to say we can't give them advice it is however to say we can't for it on them and must not keep repeating our advice to the point of pushing them away which I have been guilty of at times and am now currently working on not doing that Does it mean I won't still butt my nose in, well probably not but it does mean I will try to not do it as often and only if I am concerned for the physical and emotional well being. I love them enough to try to give advice at times, even if it makes them mad although making them mad isn't my intention and I love them enough to step back at others times and let them learn their lessons the hard way as I did which is extremely hard when you want to help. So give advice and help when you can and step back and be quiet when needed and always always love them unconditionally even when you don't approve of and/or condone their choices, actions or words...

Parenting Doesn't Come With Instructions It Comes With Experience

Parenting doesn't come with instructions., oh we can read books and we can read blogs such as this one or others, however the only true way to learn about parenting is each day being a parent. You will find that hands on is the best experience even when we make bad choices for ourselves and/or our children of which I myself am guilty of both. We will make decisions that we try to convince ourselves are the right ones, to discover later they were some of the worst ones we could make. We can't change most choices and by the time we realize we realize what our choice is doing to ourselves and/or our children the damage is already done. Most parents would not intentionally hurt their children even though we inadvertently. do. Whether we have chosen to no longer be with our children's other parent, we chose to remarry, we say things we feel is to protect them, but it instead they are hurt by them many times because our words are added to, taken from or completely twisted, then there are times we may something out of anger that we later regret, yet it doesn't change that the words were said, etc there are too many examples to list here. The point is that we all make bad choices and mistakes, but the two are not always the same. See the following defintions for both chies and mistakes and then see the similarities and differences. Hint: One is intentional (a choice) and one is unintentional ( a mistake) of which a choice was made not meant to hurt others including ourselves and of which I would dare to day that we are all guilty of both.

Choice :  

Definition of choice (n)

Bing Dictionary

choice

 [ choyss ]   

1. act of choosing something or somebody: a decision to choose one thing, person, or course of action in preference to others
2. power to choose: the chance or ability to choose between different things
3. selection of things: a variety of things, people, or possibilities from which to choose

Synonyms: excellent, high-quality, optimal, special, prime, best, select

 Definition of mistake (n)

Bing Dictionary

mis·take

 [ mi stáyk ]   

1. incorrect act or decision: an incorrect, unwise, or unfortunate act or decision caused by bad judgment or a lack of information or care
2. error: something in a piece of work that is incorrect, e.g. a misspelling or a misprint
3. misunderstanding: a misunderstanding of something

Synonyms: blunder, gaffe, faux pas, lapse, misstep, blooper, miscalculation, clanger, bloomer

I myself am deeply sorry for my bad choices and my mistakes of which sadly I have made many of both, that have inadvertently hurt my children and others over the years.

We however cannot beat ourselves up over our choices and/or mistakes nor can we allow others to do that to us as well. We can choose to apologize and move forward and do our best to make better choices and less mistakes as people and as parents. We can read all the instructions books we want as stated earlier, but even then we truly aren't prepared for what is ahead for us and our children as parents.. Parenting is an experience and an adventure in which we will who are parents will learn is no tan easy road to travel, but it is one well worth it all in the end...